I’m gonna miss this view
do it – it completely transforms how you see yourself, how you see your future, how you see other people, how you see the world. pursue the truth and then surround yourself with it, so that you can always turn to it when faced with lies.
Missing the happiest kids I’ve ever met.
I had never seen so much joy, I had never been greeted with so much joy. As soon as we stepped out of the bus when we arrived in Noah’s Ark, the kids had already run up to meet us and we were greeted by hugs and smiles and held hands. They were laughing and dancing with us within seconds and climbing on us, loving being lifted into the air. I had never felt so much love and joy seeing people I’d never met before, I had never been welcomed with so much excitement before. I had never had a heart so bursting with love and giddiness at these kids just overflowing with joy and laughter. I was touched by their unreserved and unconfined joy and their freely-given love, hugs and smiles. I want to be like them, able to take the hand of anyone I meet and begin dancing freely and joyfully with them, unhindered by fear of judgement – just reckless, uncontained joy and love.
Prelims. This year’s pressure has been different. Last year, I was stressed because of the impact my Highers would have on my future, but this time, Advanced Highers have less impact in determining my future. At least, I can theoretically get into universities without them. But this year holds a new struggle. This year, I was exhausted and dreading having to repeat what I did last year, but I felt like I had to. I had to keep up this standard that I had set last year. I had to prove myself. I felt like if I didn’t work as hard as I did last year – nearly over-working – then I would be letting myself and others down. It was a pressure that I was putting on myself to perform a certain way, get a certain grade, to be perfect. But it was paralyzing me from finding joy amidst prelim stress, I was guilty for the time I spent not revising, and when I was revising, I could barely bring myself to do it because I was so overwhelmed by the work I thought I had to do. But I wasn’t satisfied – I didn’t want it to be a period of time where I had no joy. Because no matter what, I will continue to face struggles and stresses in my life, and I don’t want each time to be a period of no joy.
So I tried to find some truth to hold onto. Truth that tells me that I don’t need to strive and overwork and stress to perform a certain way. Truth that tells me that my worth isn’t defined by how I do in school. Truth that tells me who I am. Here it is:
She is strong and is respected by the people. She looks forward to the future with joy.
I am strong and I have a hopeful future – I am not afraid of what might happen, I am excited by the adventures ahead.
1 Thessalonians 5:5
5 You are all people who belong to the light and to the day. We do not belong to the night or to darkness.
I am full of light – I belong to it. I belong to light and hope and joy – not darkness, fear and sadness.
11 And not only that, but now we are also very happy in God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we are now God’s friends again.
I AM GOD’S FRIEND! A FRIEND OF THE THE CREATOR OF THE WORLD!! HOW COOL!
6 Since you are God’s children, God sent the Spirit of his Son into your hearts, and the Spirit cries out, “Father.” 7 So now you are not a slave; you are God’s child, and God will give you the blessing he promised, because you are his child.
I am not only God’s friends – I am his child. I am protected and loved and valued by the creator of the whole world. He loves me and pursues me through Jesus and the Holy Spirit. He knows every detail of who I am – each quirk and feature of what makes me unique; and he loves it all, because he created it.
6 God began doing a good work in you, and I am sure he will continue it until it is finished when Jesus Christ comes again.
God is living and working in me. He is doing a good work in me – he is making me into the person I’m supposed to be. I’m a work in progress – but I’m a good work, on good progress.
39 But we are not those who turn back and are lost. We are people who have faith and are saved.
I am not lost!!! I am found and rescued and guided!
1 Corinthians 15:10
10 But God’s grace has made me what I am, and his grace to me was not wasted.
My. Life. Is. Not. Wasted.
1 Samuel 16:7
God does not see the same way people see. People look at the outside of a person, but the Lord looks at the heart.
I have a beautiful heart – I am more than what I look like. I am my heart, and mind, and soul, and spirit.
1 Thessalonians 1:4-5
4 Brothers and sisters, God loves you, and we know he has chosen you, 5 because the Good News we brought to you came not only with words, but with power, with the Holy Spirit, and with sure knowledge that it is true.
I am CHOSEN! I am LOVED!!!!!!!
You shine like stars in the dark world.
I have an impact on the world around me – I am a light and a hope. I shine.
AND THIS ALL APPLIES TO YOU READING THIS TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! ❤ ❤
I hope that this is some hope to you – you are so much more than your grades, your appearances, or how others see you. You are worthy and loved and special – the creator of the WORLD says so!
yellow is joy — it is the only colour that seems to shine a light of its own. it is bright and opens eyes to see – it doesn’t hide, it is bold and happy. it is content and warm. it is unapologetic — it doesn’t want to be any other colour. it’s the colour of the sun, and honey, and sunflowers, and yellow paint. it’s the only colour that continues to be bright when it is a cloudy day – it seems to make its own light. it is joy.
Every New Year I write something on this blog, normally talking about what my New Year Resolutions are and about the hope and excitement I have for a whole new year of exciting things lying ahead of me! Here we are again – and I still have that same hope and excitement and expectation for what the new year will hold! What adventures I might have, what new people I might meet, what new things I’ll learn about myself… It always excites me when I think about where I could be with my faith in a year’s time — what kinds of adventures God could be taking me on, how He might be using me! I love thinking about where I want my relationship with God to be this time next year, how I want to be living out my faith… It’s always the same — I want to level up with God! I want to hear more of His voice and see Him shaping the lives around me as well as my own! I want to be daily filled with and led by His Spirit —–
There’s the key: daily.
The things we do daily are what will shape where we are this time next year, no matter what our goal is. There’s something really wise that my dad always says this time of year when my mum and I start talking about our New Year Resolutions: he says that we shouldn’t wait for the new year to make resolutions, we should make resolutions every day. If there’s something worth changing, or something worth striving for, why wait until the New Year? And that is so true! When we think of the huge goals we set for ourselves as the year stretches out ahead of us, it’s quite daunting. How am I ever going to get to the place where I want to be this time next year? It feels so easy to give up already. It’s hard to be patient and perseverant in pursuing these goals when they seem so far away into the future – if we think our goal is far off in the end of the year, we lose sight of the truth that our choices each day have impacts on where we are at the end of this next year. It’s easy to become shortsighted and passive rather than daily intentional with reaching our yearly goals. So by making New Day Resolutions, it is much more achievable to do what we are striving to do, and we become much more intentional and active in pursuing what we want.
For me, I have a few New Resolutions that I will be reminding of myself everyday this year:
- Plug more into God – continue to read His word every day, but to also sit and wait on God. To pray continually and learn to hear from God by waiting and listening.
- Love deeper and wider and more freely – I want to be overflowing with love for everyone around me, I want to give more, I want to speak more encouraging words to people and to always be ready to listen.
- Be aware of myself and to act accordingly – I want to be aware of when I’m stressed and to take time to find peace again; I want to be aware of when I’m feeling down about myself and to take the time to pick myself up again – be that by writing myself a little pep talk, reading God’s word or thinking of things that I like about myself; I want to be aware when I’m not loving others and to shift my focus back to how God sees the people around me, and how I should see them.
- Be more thankful and savour the moment, enjoy the details of right now.
- To be more thankful for others and to let them know it — I want to do things like writing thoughtful, earnest letters of the details of why I love them. I want to be genuine and kind and insightful and to build people up with my words.
So, I hope this lil’ blog post encourages you to make daily resolutions to get to where you want to be this time next year and to live life more fully 🙂
i’m tired and i need a break.